There are certain things that come with being a Redneck, right? My definition?
People who have or like things such as:
- 4WD trucks (I need one badly)
- Farmers tans
- Guns
- Mullets
- Wal-Mart
- Nascar-lovers
- Bad Tattoos
You get the picture?
So, a few days ago as I was scrolling through photos to use for another story. I found myself saying “Hmmmmm… I’m not sure I want to use THAT photo- It’ll make me look like a Redneck!”
So the question is:
Do I Have To Claim Redneck RVer Status?
Don’t forget… much of the time, I live in the woods. Sometimes down by a river. On dirt roads. I’ve tried to go ‘4 wheeling’ in my 2WD.
Anyway, take a look for yourself:
Rope swing. Yeah- looks Rednecky to me.
Wearing a boat on my head. Redneck? Or just Country?
Wait, shooting a BB gun? TOTAL Redneck move! If you don’t think so, look at my shorts. CAMO????!! I bought them (from Wal-mart) thinking they would help me see more animals in the wild on hikes. (BAAAA-HAHAHA!)
Speaking of Wal-Mart…
All summer long, I have been accused of ‘stalking’ another RVer who has been illegally moochdocking in the Durango Wal-Mart ALL. SUMMER. LONG.
It became sort of a game… EVERY time I went into Durango to hit Wally World, I would have to look for him. Only didn’t see him one time. He was probably was getting gas. Every time I saw him, I felt oddly satisfied.
I had noticed the little rickety RV the very first day I rolled into town. I noticed him again the next visit and thought, ‘Is that the same RV? Can’t be… ‘ -but it was.
He’s been in Durango since at LEAST the beginning of June, until I left Colorado very recently. So, I’ve been to Wal-Mart a lot.
Wal-Mart + stalking = Redneck?
More Proof Of Potential Redneck Status:
Horses right outside my door… Redneck?? (Actually, I loved it. Redneck or not)
This one has nothing to do with being Redneck, but I thought I would include it for pure entertainment value:
Kelly= A Total Mess In The Kitchen.
The crock pot photo- it’s cracked. Why? Because I was too lazy to take the food out. So I put the pot on the glass stove, straight from the fridge, to heat it up. It cracked.
The skillet? Cooked up some meat.
The meat on the floor? Oops, dropped it.
The spaghetti? I picked it up to make and the open end was ‘down’. (And why is it on the bed?)
Oatmeal? Tried to pick it up by the top, and it warped and opened.
The top left photo- just to show you I’m a mess in a house as well. Oh yeah.
More Redneck Moves:
Fishing. I’m not a fan. I don’t want to hurt the fish. I won’t be fishing anymore. So, I guess we can’t include this in the Redneck evaluation.
Good grief, a photo in front of a woodpile? Guys drinking PBR? ‘NECK! 😂
I let my Chihuahua get THIS dirty??? Shouldn’t she be dressed in some sort of foo-foo garment? (No, no, no, no…) Ok, she’s pretty much never this dirty. NEXT!
I have peed off of this trail. I have also done the other, off this trail. Off of a river. Off of a boat. Brought toilet paper. ‘Necky?
Using an apple cord for a ponytail holder??? Is that Redneck or not? Either way, it was a MacGyver move.
“EEEWW! Dude! We didn’t want to see your nasty (but cutely shaped) foot!” I know, but… does this make me a Redneck?
I know, but… does this make me a Redneck? NO! This one doesn’t.
Why?
My feet got this dirty from walking barefoot inside my rental house… BEFORE I cleaned the floors! 😖 (I recently went back to Florida to get my house ready for new renters.) Yes, it was that dirty. 😞
HERE I am avoiding getting struck by a wild fly fishing line behind me. Feeling necky…
MORE guns?? And this is a ‘real’ gun. Practicing shooting. I own three guns. This is not one of them. Redneck?
AAAAAAND lastly, I even took a photo of my awesome shot (the center hole). Feeling pretty ‘necky right about now. 😂
That’s it. It doesn’t seem as bad when I put the photos into a story. (Thank god.)
No, I don’t really think I am a Redneck, this was meant for fun, but hell, you tell me! 😂
Thank you for sharing this story with me- it’s not as fun to do it all alone!
The End. Gizmo’s end, that is. 😉
Amusing as all get out … but sort of frightening too #1 to think that you ARE skirting redneck profile and #2 to include location and pic of Walmart resident RVer. Isn’t blogging like the Net – you can hang yourself with too much info? But the pix/comments made me LMAO – good job!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yeah, I’m officially ‘outed’ as being a neck, by letting the photos go public! Oh well. I’ll be much less of one in the desert for the winter. 😊
LikeLike
And, so glad you laughed! That’s my goal. 😁
LikeLike
Oh, that horsie is totes a redneck. It’s *teeth*.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good point! Need to get that mare down to Mexico for some cheap dentures. 😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Shit.
*Its
I know my damn apostrophe rules. Autocorrect is a mofo.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am officially in luv now..hahaha…you Crack me up as usual..hahaha
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL! Ok, next post, we can get married! Thanks so much for the positive feedback! : )
LikeLike
👍👍 hahaha
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great post ! Love the little trailer at Walmart, and the comfort you find in seeing it there each time.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s a little perplexing. I guess it’s satisfying sort of like finding ‘Where’s Waldo’can be! Thanks, Susan!
LikeLike
I am not sure if you are quite there yet. You do come from Florida… so it is genetically possible, but there are a few more steps. Check these off your list and you may have earned yourself a confederate flag sticker and a gun rack for your truck.
1. Attend (and enjoy) a monster truck rally.
2. Get yourself a Lynyrd Skynyard T Shirt (with holes)
3. You have to kill and gut Bambi. Sorry but it is absolutely required!
4. Give up the fancy micro brews. Beer is PBR or Bud. Miller lite if you have a vag.
5. Find a few conspiracy theories and stick with them despite so called facts.
Happy Trails!!
LikeLiked by 2 people
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! I may have just peed myself a little!
Ok, NO WAY am I a redneck! I simply CANNOT do #3 unless it’s a life or death situation.
I don’t drink #4. (The PBR was drunk by the guys) I hate beer.😁 Not saying PBR is Craft, don’t get me wrong!
I COULD physically attend a monster truck rally, but would just be saying to myself the whole time, ‘Why?’.
NO LS t-shirt with holes! 😂 I have to draw a line there.
And finally, I could handle doing number 5.
To sum it all up, I think I will qualify not! AND, somehow, after living in Northwest Florida for around 35 years, I somehow ESCAPED, unscathed, and un-necked! Mostly.
Thanks for that reply, you crack me up!!!
LikeLike
OMG! I’ve crapped my cut off Daisy Dukes laughing!
I’m a Yankee Redneck. I have just a tad bit more class added to my Redneck antics. 😉
Spilling in the kitchen is a talent of mine also. Glad I’m not alone .
LikeLiked by 1 person
You make ME laugh!!!! Oh, I am sure I sometimes lean a little ‘necky’ these days. No biggie! Fun is fun, right? You’re not alone, sista. You’re not alone. 😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Durango? Heck you’re just up the road from us. We’re about 4 miles south of the border down US 550.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I WISH I was still there! Had to beat feet to get out of the snow before it settled in. I love that whole area! Lucky you…
LikeLike
No labels. Just a great life!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You got that right, Chris! 😁 Thanks for reading and for leaving a comment. See ya on the road somewhere! 🚐
LikeLike
You are too funny! Love your blog!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! Laughter is the best- I hope to keep you smiling!
LikeLike